Braving All Odds

do you care about what others think?

2010-07-16T17:59:00.000-07:00

do you? are your intentions ever misunderstood? do their opinion make you despise yourself? well.. think about it... even the closest people sometimes, do misunderstand. How do you deal with it?

I had a person, who once misunderstood me.. well.. i tried so much..so intensely to make it clear... to ask for a solution to the hate that was building inside of them.. i failed. I went into a shell.. despised everything i was.. tried going in the opposite direction of my true self... but then years later..it all became so clear.. the truth of life!!

Its really so funny how so much of trust can all go in a very opposite direction.. we belive the people who are close to us..do understand us..very well.. infact..sometimes we feel they understand us..more than ourselves.. how more wrong could we get?.. my experience has shown me that.. we cant get any more wronger than this!!.. yeah.. Noone understands us better than we do.. no one even attempts!!.. We are a lonely species.. dont get me wrong.. i meant.. that there are moments in our life... thoughts in our life.. where only we can go.. no-one else can come to..

so although we do and should feel comfortable and nice and happy with people around us.. our real self should be content with solitariness also.. because people change..people really dont-care beyond a certain extend about what and who we really are. Just keep that in mind.. you wont ever be dissapointed.. promise!

somethings are meant to be and somethings are not. Even if u try changing it, somethings will change still somethings will not ;P

2010-01-14T16:17:00.000-08:00

do i need this status quo or do i need to get out of this comfort zone and make this second chance 100% worth the gift i was given?.. I can do anything now.. i can be who i want to be..who'ever' i want to be... whoever i have 'always' wanted to be... nothing is holding me back now... nothing 'can'. The biggest question is.. am i upto i?.. maintaining the status quo is easy...its like working on a stable build without any RLI commits.. ;P... the real challenge is getting out and risking and taking effort and being the person and doing the thing that makes the best of your talent.. the best possible use of it. hmmmm.... i'll come back to this... just hold on to this for a day... let me think abt it some more ..

All izz well... or is it???

2010-01-05T04:21:00.000-08:00

What do i say now??... i am living a dream!!.. seriously... its become so so much easier to brave challenges these days.... first big news as obvious is that ive got a new job!!... I'm now working in juniper networks. Yeah that takes us to the second big news... I've relocated to Bangalore from my hometown Cochin!!... i think i'm in here for the long haul ;P... i do miss the foodies back home... but i definitely don't miss the weather!! haa.. haa..

On a serious note... ive been feeling this void since a long time..and i have run out of excuses to not do something larger-than-(my)life... before it was exams.., stable job..., the rush to get a good job...parental pressures... u name it..i had it..!! but now.. as i said..i'm living a dream... before i snap out of it.. i've decided to make this chance i've been given to the best use possible. I've approached MAD, to help me started in my volunteering quest.

I've always liked the approach taken by MAD towards the toughest problems that our society faces. Education is a liberating force. When people are "empowered" by education... and they are able to stand up on their own feet...they will feel true dignity and will become truly "free". This approach of using education as the liberating tool.. also scales better than most other approaches and is the most effective tool for the long-term empowerment of the individual. There is never a more important task than sharing knowledge. When the knowledge you share, uplifts someone from poverty.. from their bondage.. from their desperateness.. It makes the sharing all the more sweet and all the more purposeful.

Juniper Networks!!!

2009-11-16T05:52:00.000-08:00

Yeah yeah..its a cisco competitor...so what?? Juniper is the king of high performance networking...its the smaller markets that cisco thrives in...;P. A software only, approach of cisco, that's ridden with interoperability issues and inconsistencies in every stage coz of the M&A's that is pursued relentlessly cannot result in a better product... not even close.

Finding Nemo

2009-07-26T01:19:00.000-07:00

When things are solvable and not that challenging I could afford to get lost in the material world and the mess that surrounds me.. but Since the going is getting tough I need to find that true self of mine that got lost in the clutter.... Finding my most truest form is not impossible... in this quest surely I will rediscover things about myself. Finding nemo is to find my lost "me". Im sure its there within me somewhere..just need to give it more voice than the noises that surround it..

Why i want that CCIE #

2009-07-21T20:18:00.000-07:00

Many say its for the money...even i came in for that...but frankly the # takes money from u... its take.. not give...heck not even the airfare is refunded nor the hotel expenses.. and after that its not going to give u any easy job...u'll have to find it and you'll have to be ready for it just like everybody else..

So now why would i give into such a tough regime of exam...just for an ego boost with the #?? i could get a better ego boost by getting into linux kernel dev.. or into some core commit team of some really famous open source projects... oh heck..i could even try that google code jam a shot and who knows.. ;)

What excuses do i have left??... well for one it was getting real tough to motivate me to continue... i mean i havent reached anywhere in my journey yet..just reached the 2nd lab of ipexpert workbook.... lost focus and motivation... But i think i may have just found them back... CCIE journey gives you a lot of new ways to think about certain problems... u will learn a lot of self-confidence-depended-learning-skills... and also how to meet tough learning targets under pressure... the wealth of information and the quantity of it will make you want to get that datamining skill with exponential efficiency ;).... it will in a practical timeframe make you want to avoid common errors of judgement and technical gotcha's that you would have encountered and wasted time in say the first 5 years of work... It will give you a pretty accurate foundation upon which you can build your networking career.. once you have got that # and also put some genuine personnel effort in career development/progress then surely u can after 4 years of solid work get to go to some good Bschool and come out as prospective IT Managers in your specialised domains... ;)... sounds kwel to me... in short CCIE # is everything about the journey...its so very little about the # itself...with the #, its cisco who stands to gain more than you...but with the journey..its all about you..;)...so happy studying... be true to yourself... if you take crazy shortcuts...remember u r only cheating yourself out of the journey... best of luck to us all... ;)

great ccie voice study articles...u cannot afford to miss..

2009-07-11T07:05:00.000-07:00

really interesting.... for free??.. cant believe it... thank you!!

http://www.networkworld.com/community/blog/6202

"Get Busy living...or Get Busy Dying" -- The Shawshank Redemption

2009-06-28T14:32:00.000-07:00

Well.. i just decided to get busy living.. ;).. CCIE preps get back to full flow after i wake up.. Heard from " cisco live " that I wil be able to book the lab at banglore july16 onwards... so i will keep my same shedule(dec 22nd 2009).. but instead of brussels..will be at banglore... ;)

to keep my humanity in check and to truely be satisfied and give meaning to my existance.. i have to start getting socially active..along with my work...

http://www.indianredcross.org/education.htm

http://www.sos-childrensvillages.org/What-we-do/Pages/default.aspx

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Missionaries_of_Charity

Scheduled Lab at Brussels on 22nd DEC 2009

2009-06-20T08:02:00.000-07:00

now onto serious studying... I plan to study for the next two months using only my home lab. It covers most of the core topics. I use gns3 and vmware. I have a laptop for internet and gns3 that is 2gb ram and dualcore. Also for the vmwares i have quad q9550 8gb system.

i build my lab based upon inspiration and initial knowledge from : www.blindhog.net.

Materials i use for LAB study : ipexpert workbook1&2 + cisco srnd + cisco.com + ciscopress + forums/mailinglist/blogs(to interact and get clearer understanding) + Misc materials(objective here is to learn from as many sources(potenially unreliable) as possible, but always crosscheck it with cisco.com and forums)

June and July i will be covering all the technologies that can be done in my home lab. In August i will use online rentals to study the leftover topics say 25% of the whole. Also i will do 3 fullscale labs by sep7th. high accuracy and moderate speed/timemanagement will be my goal here. then on september7 till 11th i will attend a mocklab workshop of ipexpert lead my Mark Snow. I plan to get more extensive experience in hardtolearn technolgies and polish my strategy and get lifesaving tips. finally i will be doing fullscale labs and improving my speed and accuracy in the remaining months of october and november. I will be using 25 X 7 hour onlinelabs within the time from the mockweek till exam. ie 2 labs a week. that will continue till dec20th.. after which time i will just stop looking at any book/lab..and be prepared for lab with a good sleep and good state of mind.

Second Chance

2009-06-20T07:05:00.000-07:00

The thing I like about life is the second chances we get at every moment. Anyone can always rebound from any failure; no matter how big it may seem a task, its always possible. One time i was asked in the final round of a "best manager" competition that what is the one thing that i like about life.. i had said that i liked the "opportunities" that every instance in life presented us with.

Things haven been going well since a long time.. failures, one too many have bogged me down. People who i cared and loved, have left me .. Life has come a full circle to where i had to sitdown and introspect... to see with more clarity, the things i love, the principles i will die for. That life presents itself with imense opportunities to move ahead, to move left or right..is an experienced reality for me.

I have decided that i will not change. But instead i will try to rediscover what it really means to be "me". away from the commercialism and the material world around me.. i will find the power to really uncover and reclaim the lost meaning that "i" always stood for. I will be leading a life that is based on principles and that reflects the real person that i am.

Yes everyone deserves a second chance.. there no person so evil that he can be denied of it. I know that the universe will be happy to give me a second chance, for i have taken a vow to make my life worthy of every breath that i am allowed to take.

I passed CCIE VOICE Written!!! 350-030 today!!!

2009-04-04T03:35:00.000-07:00

after a whole season of hugely frustrating on and off studying.. i pased today.... on first attempt.... now i get the privilege to to schedule the laab!!!..... rtp or sanjose... lemme see....

Finally QOS.... first phase of study completed...

2009-01-29T09:34:00.000-08:00

I am now in cucm again.... have a few more topics in QOS to cover... and i havent touched the "WLAN, LAN,WAN,VPN designs".... used srnd, end_to_end_qos, ipexpert vik's ccvp CoD, cbt nuggets(jeremy).....

will get back to QOS some time next week...

http://www.yourfilelink.com/get.php?fid=483869

Lifeee is sooo hard...... didnt get outta my room today... and even missed lunch.... uhhhh.. gnite all... lemme get a deserved sleep

Am putting up my Notes here.. ;)

2009-01-27T06:33:00.000-08:00

I will be putting daily notes here... in .rtf format.. mostly the notes will be incremental.. ie, after i put up the day's note.. tommo again i will replace it with the updated one... the date(on the blog) will be there so u'll know which is what ;)...

"There is no such thing as a free lunch" russian proverb... "There is no such thing as a free beer" Australian proverb... so this ones not "free".... it will be obviously mistake ridden... and i am giving you an opportunity to correct this poor mortal being... I am as u know on the path of getting my CCIE.. so any help i recieve will be gratefully acknowledged ;)

Thank you readers, May the force be with you ;)

Today i will be continuing QOS.. so by tomo QOS will be over. I will get back to CUCM only day after.

here posted is my current notes of CUCM and QOS .

cucm : http://www.yourfilelink.com/get.php?fid=483498
QOS : will upload before i sleep.

Where am i??... what is the meaning of this??... ahhhh.. who's on phone??... is this a phone??..

2009-01-09T20:12:00.000-08:00

it all started with me having as problem with the tube light... i then removed its cover.. and it shone as brightly as i had wanted... that tube was there for around 5 years and i havent had problem.... it was only now..when i was onto my call routing chapter that i noticed i had a problem with it... by now i had finished reading the wildcard descriptions given in a table.

I wanted to change my seat... i took the sofa outside my room... then finally without an alternative.. i put it back inside....

finally i got to reading again.... then i noticed my eye's wer hurting.... the tube was very bright..and the light was straining my eye corner..... after sitting in various angles.. i settled on the initial position itself....

By now i understood..these uncomfortabilities wer all just tricks.. that the book was playing on my mind.... so i went ahead....

then.... someone called me.... it was my sis... handed me a something.. and said someone was calling.... i first asked her who she was... my sis didnt bother answering.... she just handed me the phone... i looked at it a while... she asked me to place it on my ears... and then a voice.... "its me.. vibin... call manager isnt installing... the cucm6.0 showed some "dump" message in my lap... is it some vmware problem??... how do i solve it?? ".... i asked... "who"??.. voice said..
its me vibin.."... I said... "uhhhh... shall catch u later.. "... and i came out of my sleep....

though the phone had woken me.... i was still not fully aware.... my eyes wer red... and i felt hungry.... i ate my dinner... and there was nothing else i wanted to do..than get a sleep....

uhhhhh...... i will fight back..... will finish the call routing chapter..and then only i will blog next.....

lazy... sleepy.... drowsy... lousy... frustrated ... headaches.... any thing..... everything..... but bored...

2009-01-09T02:32:00.000-08:00

yeah... not bored... that's the biggest news this hour.... not bored even one bit... am now in call routing... though sleepy.. am not bored.... lemme see what this book can throw at me..... trust me.... this book is gonna face a surprise.... i've my basics right.... i may not hit huge....but i wont throw my wicket away!!..... perseverance is something that i have perfected...

CCVP done and over... CCIE "voice" preps starting now...

2009-01-08T07:38:00.000-08:00

After getting into the voice side of cisco...it seems as if its all a dream... very good dream.... Have u had that feeling in a particular day.... that every bite u take... is the buttered side??.. What can i say??... being with cisco... learning.... doing.... working.... no matter what track u take.. u cant be wrong... its always the buttered side.....

VOIP is a fast growing, high turnover field. Its also something from my dream... yeah... D R E A M... when i was in high school... i had to make this dicision... about my career... and one of the reason i opted to be an engineer is that i could build things that "connects" people.... guess what... UNIFIED COMMUNICATION is exactly that kinda thing.

its funny how life goes about... i am a good programmer... and i could have easily got into any of the IT cos in india.... those outsourced programer profiles... But i came close.. not close enough... after a lot of twists and turns.... i now find myself looking down this book... " call manger fundamentals".. chapter 2.. call routing... My face with a clinical smile... that of a tiger who sees his inevitable ccie #.... soon to come... ;)

by the way.. this book( http://www.themanbookerprize.com/news/stories/1146) ... "the white tiger" is a refreshing light read in between ;)

Updates

2008-11-03T19:48:00.000-08:00

I dumped fedora.. am using ubuntu(64 bit mostly..and 32 bit as backup) now... been using it(ubuntu) for quite a while. Also dumped vista, am using xp pro sp3. Vista was good... but resource hungry... i had enough for vista.... but thats the keyword.. "enough". I couldnt get luxurious with anything else(vmware, gns3 ..etc...).... if i ran vista ;).

I am writing my last paper in ccvp series.. 642-426 today... after that.. i become ccvp ;)

I want to do research and engineer a product in http://in.youtube.com/watch?v=Q-Gm0cuMHNI , http://www.researchchannel.org/prog/displayevent.aspx?rID=4743 , http://portal.acm.org/citation.cfm?id=567365 , http://www.cs.rochester.edu/research/cisd/pubs/2001/allen-et-al-aimag2001.pdf

who wants to share?

2008-07-18T03:14:00.000-07:00

http://joeljose420.googlepages.com/rayofhope

just a humble beginning.... will take it forward. sure.

Wikipedia has citated me!!!! wow!!! kwel..

2007-09-15T06:14:00.000-07:00

with immense satisfaction and greater surprize, I am proud to anounce that wikipedia, has given my site and my article as a citation for its topic on Idle Scan.. No wonder, given the fact that google has put my article, on 1st page!!.. hmmm.. looks like.. someone out there is encouraging me to go on.... thanks...to whoever it is ....thank you ;)

Fedora.... The mission starts ;)

2007-08-24T19:06:00.000-07:00

Ive after a lot of thought and planning..decided to go with fedora core as my mainstream distro for personnal use...... i am learning for rhce..so that makes it a partially easy choice...but the best part was that.. i was getting "good" performance out of it..and the community was "good"....and its an offspring.. run by the same people started by the same code as my first ever linux distro.. redhat 9.. ah.. what a distro... kudos to redhat!! ;)...

forget???...... hard for the things u love....

2007-08-11T07:11:00.000-07:00

i am a person wit very little memory retention power and a huge amount of grasping power... one weakness balances the other strength ;).....

But even i find it very very difficult to let go and forget and move on, leaving behind things we love. May be some other type of people find it easy to let go. But i am definitely not in that species. Its a sad fact that i am a human. I have emotions, very integral part. But i have no means or capability to control them. Human beings have emotions, I am a little too human in that respect.

Life teaches u a lot..... during the lessons..its very hard to exist...but if i must survive.....if not for me..at least for the people who will benefit by my survival... i musn't let life down by disobeying its primal rule : survive till the end. Hold on till the last moment. The purpose of life is to exist and to support existence, to propagate life. I will not disobey. Disobeying life's rules is to disregard the lifeforms that has ever come and gone.... i cant do that. none should.

now its back to the future ;)

2007-08-09T02:55:00.000-07:00

After major reconstructions of my mind.... after being blown to pieces by ma gal.... now i am picking up the pieces... i mean i have picked up the remaining pieces of my life.... am going for the kill... having nothing to loose... am doing my ccna and rhce now.. morning 10am-1pm rhce and 2pm-5pm ccna.... ;).... lets see what i can do in the world of networking !!!! ... the networking world..... Here i come!!!!!!..... ;) ;) ;)

BEing ME!!

2007-08-05T06:46:00.000-07:00

Well... what does it take for me to be me??.... guts, intelligence, strength, faith, confidence.... in fact it takes everything for me to be me. And i will.. I Am

Will my blogging last?

2007-01-11T12:54:00.000-08:00

i have tried to be a regular blogger.. with litle success.. i dont even write my diary;(.. ofcourse that burst of writing do take place once a while..

This is different... A lot of thing... actually.. one main thing has happened... I am in love!!.. not jus that i am in love.. my love has been rewarded with a more loving love !!! ;).. My life will change for sure.. but for now.. lets start with blogging for a change.... ;)

I feel my creativity and passion will now be unleashed.... i am feeleng so "free".. so "full of love".. in the comming days.. my creativity and passion will get a boost.. i will surely be in my dangerous potentials..;)....

Thank ya my love.. my darlin... this blog was for ya ;)

MY sunshine... My sweetie pie... My dreamy pie...

#######################oldest blog entries below###########################

THURSDAY, OCTOBER 12, 2006

ok.. now i can start posting "fresh" entries...

yipeeeeeee!!!!

If you can make one heap of all your winnings............And risk it on one turn of pitch-and-toss, And lose, and start again at your beginnings;

....And never breath a word about your loss;

I flunked for the security+ paper. Its not the 10700rs that just went down the drain that sucks.. its the feeling that i flunked just by a margin of one question; and that too even after getting 83 quest right, out of a total 100!! hmmm, i know that i have learnt it. that i dont have to prove it to anyone. But all that doesnt cover up for the fact that i really "lost" out on that paper, which i so much needed to pass!! If i had passed it i would have been a security+ certified professional. Whew that would have given me easy go at a lot of things. Not just professionally, i also required it for confidence in my evryday tasks. Now that i was on a failing spree, i was hoping to clamp it by this cert. Anyway, recently in life lots of terrible things have happened. If at all anything, life by its failures have thought me to live beyond it. By showing me its rough edges, life has taught me a lot, which i wont forget in a hurry. Before i end, i jus want to quote my fav poem; my fav part :

"
If you can keep your head when all about you
Are losing theirs and blaming it on you;
If you can trust yourself when all men doubt you,
But make allowance for their doubting too;
If you can wait and not be tired by waiting,
Or, being lied about, don't deal in lies,
Or, being hated, don't give way to hating,
And yet don't look too good, nor talk too wise;
If you can dream - and not make dreams your master;
If you can think - and not make thoughts your aim;
If you can meet with triumph and disaster
And treat those two imposters just the same;
If you can bear to hear the truth you've spoken
Twisted by knaves to make a trap for fools,
Or watch the things you gave your life to broken,
And stoop and build 'em up with wornout tools;
If you can make one heap of all your winnings
And risk it on one turn of pitch-and-toss,
And lose, and start again at your beginnings
And never breath a word about your loss;
If you can force your heart and nerve and sinew
To serve your turn long after they are gone,
And so hold on when there is nothing in you
Except the Will which says to them: "Hold on";
If you can talk with crowds and keep your virtue,
Or walk with kings - nor lose the common touch;
If neither foes nor loving friends can hurt you;
If all men count with you, but none too much;
If you can fill the unforgiving minute
With sixty seconds' worth of distance run -
Yours is the Earth and everything that's in it,
And - which is more - you'll be a Man my son!

"

-- Rudyard kipling ("IF")

This entry is obsolete now, but of historical value ;)

Comments ?

must have noticed that unlike normal blogs the facility for "comments" is unavailable here. I have reasons for it. One of it being, that there is always a way to reach me by email, so that commenting facility is not all that important. The more important reason being that this is a free wiki hosting service( and as of now i'm extremely impressed by them), this facility of selective publically editable zones is available only for the "premium" service ;(. Any way i hope, and would like all who read this blog, to put accross thier feelings toward the topics to me by email. My id is given in the "To know me better click here" link in the first page of this site. ;)

{April 9 '06 at 9:12 pm}

Whats the whole fuzz about?

well,
I must warn you, that the contents in this blog is very much uncensored. Moreover the issues discussed may be highly controversial; so your individual discretion is strongly adviced.

{April 9 '06 at 9:12 pm}

Hello World!!!

Hey,

This is my first blog! ever!. Actually i am not accustomed to writing a diary or a blog, instead i always have written more of letters(actually the electronic version), so this blog style will also be as that of an email, addressed by me to me!!.

{April 9 '06 at 9:12 pm}

WEDNESDAY, OCTOBER 11, 2006

Migrated!!!

hey.. this is my first blog entry in blogger.. lemme start by saying that this is a continuation.. i have migrated my blogs from my personal wiki... well the decision wasnt easy.. will share about that later ;)... immediately above are the entries.. with their actual date...